WILL YOU STAY AWAKE FOR ME?

And you're lying real still but your heartbeat is fast just like mine, and the movie's long over, that's three that have passed one more's fine. Will you stay awake for me? I don't wanna miss anything, I just don't wanna miss anything.. It's almost April, tomorrow's the last day of March. (It's been more than a year..) Yet, here I am, enclosing myself in this solitary room, listening to the sound of this emptiness and hollowed heart of mine. :| And I'm tired of being all alone in this solitary moment makes me want to come back home, back to your heart.. Back to where we should be, back to where we used to be. I have to admit, I am missing you, so much that it makes me think of you every now and then.. (I ain't referring to the guy of my previous summer anymore.. He's no longer the guy I used to see in my future, cause I simply don't feel myself, spending the rest of my life, being seriously in love with each other..) I know, they used to say "We're the best couple, that we look so perfect for each other, "You're my Gu Jun Pyo, and I am your Gum Jan Di." But now, I honestly don't know what had happened to the both of us, maybe we still have "this something for the both of us" but, it's not into depths. It isn't into this so-called real love I feel for him. Maybe, we haven't had this complete closure yet, that's why we're still acting this way towards each other, we'd never been complete strangers after our breakup, yes, you told me.. 'Twas a breakup, which means, "BROKEN". As much as I want to say goodbye, it's as if, somebody's controlling me not to erase you completely in my life.. Imagine, what a small world, we've had these common friend, see, we're even close to each other, as she's my blockmate. It's as if.. (Ayaw tayong mawalan ng connection ni FATE.) I know we've been so much through already, we've talked about how we still feel for each other. But, I don't think it's still good for the both of us. I decided to be SINGLE again, not because I want you back in my life, it's just that.. I want to have this time for myself, to set things straight and make them right, for me to think whom really to choose. And I have to admit, after that night, when you told me, you're in desperate to hug me, the very first time you saw me, and even at latest wee hour before you leave. (Sa totoo lang, gustong gusto narin kitang yakapin nun e, but I didn't. Cause I know it's wrong.. I'll be hurting someone, someone in my present. And I think I made the right choice.) "I need you back, I need you here beside me." I appreciate how much effort you've exerted for me that night, that you were even the earliest visitor to arrive, imagine, I was still in the Salon, having my hair and makeup done, but you were already there, seating and waiting for me.. Bu now it's over. It's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now, it's over, it's over, it can't be over. I wish that I could take it back. I just suddenly miss our long nights together, when you sings a lot of Secondhand Serenade's songs for me, same with me singing you lullaby songs too.. (But see, we have to give up.) Just give up on us Baby, we could still come true.


BUT IT'S OVER. (I could still remember how I cried for you, one summer afternoon, I was listening to my iPod, and I heard this song played..)



"Maybe it isn't the time for us, your heart, our hearts wanted to scream and sayyyyy. "Hey, I have already given up on you. Now, it's over, it's over, it can't be over. I wish that I could take it back." Til we meet again. Ciao. Sayonara.

Will you stay awake for me? ~ NO, I WON'T STAY AWAKE FOR YOU. JUST BECAUSE..
--BLUE&BERRY~28