HIC ET MUNC

Success and happiness is never final, nor fatal. It depends on how we see and perceive things, just like the way things are. Just like, this oblique reason of accepting even the minor flaws of a person. If you don't seem to accept him for who he really is, then you're not worth of this so-called "friendship". Thus, in this world we ought to learn how to choose our friends. We seem to get the reason, but never the cause. Haha, this is actually a funny evening. As in like, BIG TIME. Had a chance to have this little conversation with my ex boyfriend that seemed to eradicate an intense expulsion. Well, by nature, we are debaters. "We are ex-lovers." But I never come to this realization, that though we ended unfairly, and accidentally by nature, we still remained "friends". FRIENDS. For real? Why so? I never believe we could still be, after we both fall out of love, settle for new ones and most likely, moved on. We had fallen back again, to each others' arms. Maybe not forever, but at least once in a BLUE moon.

I admit, I missed him. As in, badly. Until now, I ain't fully forgotten him. Seriously, I can't enter into a new relationship yet because in a way, he's still here in my heart. Every time I see him right about in my wall posts, this foolish heart of mine, seem to beat faster again. Unconsciously forgetting about the things. These, in one way or the other had driven me to whisper unto my ear that "I still care for him, there is this part of you in me, that I can't really forget about, I really can't resist. As in like, I can't erase his name to the fullest, it isn't getting any cleaner evermore. I thirst for him, I feel kinda uncomfortable, seeing him smile; knowing that I am no longer the reason behind those killer smiles. :/

I still love you, BLUE, credibly. Thus, my heart is now numb, which is non-existent, when something is formless, inevitably, it is unknowable. I love you to death, as in too pieces to bits, that the presence causes the absence of my soliloquy. The sense of experience and touch that separates my heart from you. The prime matter of my soul; to the substantial form of my being. I admit it, I am affected, I feel hurt. I still want you back. Sorry for giving you false pure perplexity. Thus, I claimed harder, my love for you is "intelligible per accidence". It is "HIC ET MUNC".

HIC ET MUNC- Now and here, FOREVER. Gimme reasons, VALID COMPLEXITIES to forget you. To forget you FOR REAL. Stop throwing me sweet lines, stop telling me you like reading my loooonnngggg posts, it makes me sick. Yea, sick and longing for you. I might forgot that I am moving on, I might not be able to control this feeling of mine any longer. I might hold back and fall for you the second time around. :*

-BlueberryCHEESECAKE