Almost Is Never Enough

Almost. Almost is never enough~

If I would have known that you wanted me

The way I wanted you

Then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart

But right here in each others arms

Here we almost, we almost knew what love was

But almost is never enough~

Almost in paradise~

So close to being in love.

I almost, almost fall in love again. Too bad, too wrong it's now gone. Postponed or suddenly over? I don't know. I can't even determine what happened. It's like, a now or never situation. Seven months. Technically, I've been like in a relationship for seven months. (of course, without the commitment, it's like... No strings attached), but not really. To be exact... I think it's just too complicated to discuss on this blog entry. But the thing is, I almost. Almost. Well almost is never enough.

Exactly the way things are. Partly, it's saddening, and partly I find joy in it. Sometimes I wonder, why it turned out like this, and that? I have tons of questions in mind, that I keep on searching for some stupid answers, that although they're left unanswered, I could easily find remedies to... If only I'll open my heart. If only I'll feel a little bit sensitive about the things around me. But heck no. I've been terribly heartless, and insensitive and? Too hard on myself. I just wish I can let go of this habit. Or is this really a part of my rude character? I don't know. :(

Few months left, and I'm turning another year older, and I haven't changed a bit. The way I bitch around, and treat people, so indifferently. Simply because they don't matter in my life, and that I wouldn't benefit anything from them. I don't have the slightest idea whether I'll pursue things the way I wanted to, or just simply give up, and stop? Would I appear like coward if I'll admit that I can't do it or take some risks? Really. Am I this complicated?